Twice a year, in Christchurch is the Body Mind Spirit Festival, a two day mega-expo, filled with stalls where you can find everything from crystals, healers, readers to Christian healing prayer to an audit from the Dianetics people to SAFE with petitions for free range animals.
We've been doing this festival for (I think) 7 years now, and we've seen a lot of changes come and go in that time, our expectations have changed and at the moment it's fun again.
The thing I like the most is talking with people, the new seekers just starting out and not sure which is the right book for them, or those who want a new Tarot deck and want to discuss the differences between what we have on offer. Or those who think I'm going to agree with the shite they've just rabbited off about how ancient Wicca is, or tell me how brave I am being out there when we're still so terribly persecuted.
This weekend just gone was different. I met one awesome couple who seem to be just like me!! (so of course they're awesome right? :p) the similarities in our beliefs was surprising for me who usually manages to find something to upset everyone. What they called "peace, love and f**king mung beans" I refer to as "happy, sparkly moonbeams" but we were talking about the same people.
I met a lovely chap who has just started to learn about magic and witchcraft, but isn't sure which direction (high or low) he's headed in, he was intelligent, and it was refreshing to have someone who isn't going to take everything in a book as gospel and use his own common sense when reading things!
Then late on Sunday, I met a lady who reads this blog. In all honesty, I was kinda gobsmacked. While I know this blog is public, and I can see the analytics telling me how many people have seen each page, I still pretty much assumed that it was mostly my friends who read it, or people who know me to some extent - some of them to have something to bitch about behind my back - yes I do know that still goes on, and if I'm the most interesting thing you can find to talk about, how sad your life must be aye? Move on and grow up! - and some in support of me because they're the most awesome friends a girl can have, and some because they like the way I think, or find my rants familiar and amusing. I'm apparently following in the footsteps of someone we know and love (or love to hate).
It made me think about how I use this blog. For the most part, this is me thinking aloud. I don't think I have very good communication with myself, and writing brings out the internal stuff that my conscious mind is often not even aware of. This is how I process some events, or thoughts, and certainly not all of it gets published. Sometimes I have a point to make, sometimes I'm just being a bitch (but hopefully a useful one). I've been told that I'm too honest - not so much from a tactless point of view (although that has been raised from time to time too) but that when someone asks me what's going on, I'll tell them. There are some things that I shouldn't share because someone will use them against me.
I've recently realised that in order to make people think about some of the idiocy they spout, you first have to piss them off. If you politely and tactfully raise a point it will often be ignored. Take Hone Harawira's recent stunt for example. If he'd used nicer words, no one would have paid him any attention, but by saying something as offensive as he did, he drew attention to a point he was trying to make. Love him or hate him (and there doesn't seem to be a middle ground) he's doing his job.
So for all the good people out there who aren't my friends who read this, if I do say something that offends, ask yourself why. If I push a button, what do you need to learn about that button? And thank you to the people who do read it and support it I'll try not to let it go to my head. :)
But I would also like to especially thank Mist. Not only does he read it, he usually comments. Now he could tell me his thoughts privately but he chooses to do so publicly. He thinks sideways from the way I do, and so I learn a lot from his observations and comments.